Problems at Greasy Joe’s

Greasy Joe's is a major part of my St Kilda lifestyle. While others may breakfast at any number of the cafés, bars and restaurants that launch and fail over the years, GJ's maintained a simplicity and consistency that appealed to my "get what I want every time" sensibilities of eating out.

In the last 17 years the staff turned over almost fortnightly (initiating the fun game of "What Sort of Accented Backpacker Waiting Staff Will I Be Greeted With This Week?") but the food stayed the same. That is until about 6 weeks ago.

Greasy Joe's has done away with their large-sliced white bread in favour of the more cosmopolitan and pretentious Turkish Pide. While I'm sure this new development brings almost no complaints from the tourists* the simple fact is that Turkish Pide will not soak up the yolk as it spills from my sunny fried egg. When trying to mop up excess yolk it just moves the yellow tasty goodness frustratingly around the plate.

The plates have changed as well. Gone are the simple, round and lipped plates of yore. Now my breakfast comes on a rectangular, curved and lipless plate that barely fits my two eggs and three sausages.

This morning, after recently being told that I could order sourdough instead of the Turkish Pide, I did just that. Turkish Pide arrived and I was told that they had no sourdough. Apparently this was known to the staff who failed to inform me at the time I ordered.

This may sound like whinging. In fact, it is whinging but honestly, if I wanted change I would have started going elsewhere.

Greasy Joe's once had wonderful old-skool charm. Now it's just a try-hard, keeping up with the Joneses tourist trap.

*people who do not live in St Kilda